Here's my story doc. I went to sleep to hibernate in Montana and now months later I woke up in Wisconsin. You have to help me cure this sleep walking problem.

You want me to lose how much weight? Are you kidding?

I'm going to need you to lay on your side and bear down

Doctor: "Last time we met you were quite ill. How are you feeling now?"
Bear: "Oh much better doc, in fact, my family and I would like to have you for dinner Sunday. It's too bad my uncle Brian will not be there, he loves cheese"

" I know Doc, bend over and grab my ankles, right?"

All that cheese you prescribed for my diet has me quite constipated!

Doctor, it's looks to me that you are in a far worse medical condition than I am, you clearly have a large mass of cheese growing out of your head! I don't think you are the best Dr. too talk about my possible concussion, I am going to need a 2nd opinion.

You plan on packing what......where?

Are you a real doctor or do you just play one on TV?

Well, Doctor Rodgers, as long as you are going to bend me over this Sunday, can at least try to be gentle?

I guess you already heard I'm allergic to cheese.

"Well, you may be a General Practitioner, but you dress like a Proctologist."

"Your team's offense is giving me a pain in the...backfield"

"No, I won't try to eat you - I'm lactose ( and Lambeau) intolerant"

I dont know whats worse doc - the fact that I only have 2 weeks to live or that you are a packers fan.

"If you think I'm letting you anywhere near me with a scalpel, you can kiss my Butkus."

"Noon on Sunday seems a strange time for a prostate exam appointment."

I knew this would happen one day with Obamacare , we are really getting down to bear necessities!

Are you a Packers fan?

No, uh, I didn't just fart doc.

Sorry to tell you Yogi bear gave you STD.

Are you sure there's nothing wrong with my hands. I keep dropping everything I touch !

You see, Dr. Cheesehead, I have this problem of a sour neck, a pulled ham string, and receiver butterfingers.

F you doc, F you.

Wow doc! What did you just give me? That's some good sh*t!!

Hey Doc, I gotta tell ya, I find those plastic cheese hats very hard to digest. Would you mind removing it?

Doctor ask Bear "are you on a diet you look thin I bearly can see you"! Bear replies:"I try to eat an appetizer of honey graham crackers with cheese but never can finish what I started so I can eat a Superbowl for dinner"

Bear says no toilet paper in the restroom can I use your hat?

Are you sure you didn't mean point spread?

That concussion must have been pretty bad because I swear you're dressed like a packers fan

What do you mean there might be a conflict of interest?

Bear: "Doc, I know you're the head cheese, but I just don't agree with your diagnosis of Limburgerbromhidrosis metatarsal. It's my right shoulder that's my concern today!"

Hey doc it's almost over . See ya next year.

Mama Bear says I need to see you Doctor...ever since joining the fantasy football league I see Aaron Rogers and Packer colors everywhere I look!

Hey Rodgers!! DISCOUNT DOUBLE CHECK!!

Well doc since I can see that you are obviously a Green Bay Packers fan, if you ask me to bear down during this annual physical exam, I'll just have to stay true to the spirit of the Chicago Bears fight song:

Bear down Chicago Bears,
right on top of my Green Bay Packers fan doctor's cheesehead!

Doctor: "Yep, you have gonorrhea."

"No, I said I had a problem with my lumbar vertebrae....there is no such thing as a 'Lombardi' vertebrae."

"Doc, are you SURE you're licensed to practice in Illinois?"

Are your pants too tight or are your kneecaps just happy to see me?

I asked to see "The Big Cheese" around here, NOT "The Head Cheese"! This is ridiculous. Where are my pants?

It's easy. During halftime you run out onto the field with me wearing this cheesehead and your visit today will be free of charge.