Back Where We Belong: Shorewood Rewind

Some of us here at the Shorewood Patch went out of town earlier this month.

We took a little trip to New York, and as soon as we got off the plane at LaGuardia, who did we see but Curtis Sliwa, the guy from the Guardian Angels.

Curtis was kind of hard to miss. He was all dressed up in his red satin baseball jacket and that silly red beret. We thought he only wore that stuff when he was going on TV or getting his picture but taken, but no, he apparently wears it when he's waiting in the terminal for his flight to take off too.

So anyway, Curtis was talking on his cell phone and we didn't want to bother him, so we just tipped him a nod as we walked by, and he turned around and blew us off!

We at the Shorewood Patch were a little offended. I mean, doesn't he know where we're from? We're from Shorewood! It's the best town around.

And maybe that's why Curtis wasn't digging us. We're from a safe, law-abiding place. We don't need a bunch of beret-wearing flunkies wandering the streets to keep the criminal element in check. We don't even have a criminal element.

So if Curtis was feeling a little insecure around us, we understand. Or maybe he thought he saw Junior Gotti walking around and got scared. We'd understand that too. Because we are understanding people here at the Shorewood Patch.

So like we said, we were out of town last week, which is why you didn't get a Shorewood Rewind. We know that was rough for many of you, but these things happen.

When we got back to Shorewood we took a look at the Rewind from two weeks ago and noticed that somebody named "Steve" left the comment that "Shorewood is not great nor do 'fantastic' things happen here."

Steve went on to say, "Screw Shorewood!!!!" (That's right — with no less than four exclamation points!)

Well, we say: Screw Steve!!!!

That's right, Steve. Shorewood is great and there are no shortage of fantastic things happening here every day. Steve is just jealous, and if we had to guess, we'd say he is probably from Channahon or someplace equally inferior.

At any rate, speaking of all the fantastic things happening in Shorewood, let's take a look at some of them from the past week with the SHOREWOOD REWIND:

First with the biting, now with the scratching

A Shorewood teen jailed last month for allegedly biting up her boyfriend was charged with scratching a relative. Taylor Brown, 19, appeared in court for her latest domestic battery charge and was sent back to jail on a $5,000 bond.

Shorewood poised for disaster

First they bought a brand new four-wheel drive Chevy Tahoe for Emergency Service and Disaster Agency Director Aaron Klima to drive, and now the village board is paying for a new communication system that will come in really handy if there is a disaster. And Klima can even use it from his Tahoe!

Legal genius on Peterson defense team comes up with another brilliant idea

Walter Maksym, one of the attorneys said to be working for accused wife-killer Drew Peterson, sent out a bunch of letters demanding a halt to the movie based on the wonderful, well-written book Fatal Vows: The Tragic Wives of Sergeant Drew Peterson. It was all over the news and we were kind enough to give some quotes to the rag newspaper in Plainfield, the Herald-News, but of course they left out our favorite one: "Maksym is a two-bit clown."

Gynocologist gets out of jail

Shorewood gynecologist and obstetrician Thomas Heggen appeared in court on charges of identity theft and the unlawful acquisition of a controlled substance. He posted bond and was released from jail later in the day.